Recently, I have found myself pondering again the question of the best to die. To have a little forewarning so that family and friends have the chance to gather and say goodbye or to drop dead quite unexpectedly? Of course, as my daughter points out, it is not at binary. To die after months or years of agonizing pain cancer is obviously not a desirable death. In some religious traditions, it is important to have time to prepare one’s soul. Sudden death seems to preclude that possibility. Still it may be it preferable to the person dying, but not the family.

That was brought home to me this week as a close friend collapsed on a hiking trail and died quickly thereafter. I would hate to be his widow. I am happy that I get a few bonus years with Miklos, and that he doesn’t seem to be suffering greatly at the moment. I watched as another friend wasted away until he was gaunt andhis. His widow had done a lot of grieving well before his eventual death.

Obviously, this is a pointless as well as morbid speculation. Death comes as it will, unless we take active steps to end a life. I have found that it is also always a surprise, even when it is expected. The particular moment always catches us off guard. It is time to concern myself with things that are within my control.