I still think it is good for Miklos to have a change of scenery some of the time. It gives him some mental stimulation. But one issue is finding the balance between stimulation and confusion. We have time share points that can be used at a very large number of resorts. The resorts themselves are similar enough to one another in layout and furnishings that it is easy for him to settle in. Of course, whether we are at a resort or at home, he spends much of his time in bed, especially after a difficult day, like a day of travel.

The reason we had scheduled this particular trip was to see our older grandson playing in a volleyball tournament in San Diego. We could also see our granddaughter who had recently started her junior year at Cal State San Marcos, in a northern suburb of San Diego. And of course, since it is also in California, there was no time zone change to complicate issues. It seemed like an ideal trip.

I found the cheapest flight (or so I thought) departing from Oakland rather than San Francisco. However, the trip to Oakland International involved taking three separate BART trains, and it was difficult to navigate with Miklos. Moreover, I discovered to my chagrin that the flight was cheap because Spirit Airlines charges for everything, including carry-on luggage and even a glass of water. I won’t repeat that mistake.

AnnaBelle met us for dinner on the evening we arrived, and Miklos was elated to see her. The next morning, however, he didn’t get up. He was too tired to go the volleyball game. That was probably just as well because this was the Best of the West Tournament — thirty-two high school men’s volleyball teams, all in the same arena. You can imagine the noise and general chaos.

Amanda had also come for the tournament, and she stayed with us overnight, which, of course, pleased her father even though he didn’t dress at all that day. He entertained daughter and granddaughter in our suite in his pajamas and bathrobe. We ordered Chinese to be delivered to the hotel and had a great time. Despite the time we spent with AnnaBelle and Amanda, I began to wonder whether the effort of travel had been balanced by the rewards.

On Sunday, our Lithuanian daughter came from La Quinta to join us for the afternoon. And she had four of her five children with her! Miklos got up and dressed. He was delighted with his grandchildren. I knew the trip was worth the effort when I saw Agne hugging him, while he stroked her hair and said repeatedly, “You are such a wonderful granddaughter.”

Alzheimer’s is in some ways a very Zen disease. You live completely in the moment. Memory and anticipation no longer interfere. Each beautiful moment, like the time with his grandchildren, adds meaning. It is to be savored in the present, and that is a great gift.