My husband has always been a gregarious person. He has recently developed the habit of going over to tables of strangers in restaurants to say that he likes the way they are talking to one another, or he likes their smile, or just to ask where they are from. He always says something kind, and so far he has been well received or at least tolerated. Some of those strangers that he greets may need to have a kind word from a strange old man to make their day.

Of course, he also always flirts with little children. I wonder what they think of his missing and rotting teeth when he smiles at them. At some point, he may begin to look too scary. If that happens, it will be a very sad day.

I suspect that this new habit of talking to strangers makes up in some way for the conversations he used to have with friends whom he would meet for coffee or lunch when he was still driving. I wish that more of those friends would take the time to visit him at home. It must be quite lonely in his mind as the memory fades. More social connection would be so good for him.

Recently, his physical health has been improving. A new medication gives him a bit more energy and his caregivers always make sure he walks. He has even quit arguing with me about taking a walk, although he frequently wants to postpone it. Because improved physical health may lead to a longer life, I am extremely grateful that his disposition has become even kinder. So many people with dementia become angry and mean, even violent. Perhaps it is true that as we age, and especially as we decline, we become more like our inner selves.

I find that I, too, will now give compliments to strangers. I don’t interrupt their meals, but if I am standing in line at the grocery store, or stopping at the same red light (as a pedestrian), I will say that they have beautiful eyes, or a great sense of style, or whatever else it is about them that I appreciate. Maybe we can all learn from Miklos to reach out in kindness and make the world a kinder place.